Lustful Glances And Illicit Relationships

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Lustful Glances and Illicit Relationships May 08, 2007
In this day an age, the temptation towards to opposite gender is extremely severe, particularly for those people treading the path of piety. Shaytaan traps the nafs(false ego) quickly in this temptation because the apparent hindrances seem less. He makes one guilty of casting lustful glances towards non-mahrams (any person of the opposite gender with whom marriage is permissible).

Sheikh Ashraf Ali Thanwi (RA) writes:

1. The harms and calamities caused by having any kind of relationship with non-mahrams whether by looking at them, speaking to them to soothe oneself, or sitting by them in solitude or by beautifying one’s clothes to please or to speak gently with them are so serious that I cannot pen them down.

2. Illicit relationships are a form of ‘azaab-e-Ilaahi (Divine Punishment). Just as a person will be restless in hell-he will neither die nor live, similarly, after casting lustful glances, a person becomes involved in illicit fascinations and becomes restless and uneasy. He is completely deprived of a peaceful sleep. Both his secular and religious life is destroyed. Eventually he is admitted to an asylum. Today a large percentage of mental hospital patients are those who became insane after watching videos, movies, television, and reading lewd novels, etc…

3. After casting lustful glances and having evil thoughts, if the consequence is the act of sin, then both the participants become eternally despised. They will not even be able to look at each other in the eye. Just as a kind father wants his son to live a life of respect and not be involved in any despicable sin, likewise Allah’s infinite mercy also requires that His servants do not become immersed in any detested act and disgrace themselves. They should live a life of piety, respect, contentment with halal, and patience in abstaining from haram. The people of this world cool their eyes with worldly pleasures while the special servants of Allah cool their eyes with the worship and zikr or Allah, which is everlasting and eternal. Worldly pleasures are enveloped by thousands of calamities and are temporal.

Rasulullah (Sallallahu Alaihi WA Sallam) has cursed the one who casts evil glances and the one who is looked at by invoking the curse of Allah upon these people. People who fear the curse of the pious people should be more afraid of the curse of Allah’s messenger (Sallallahu Alaihi WA Sallam). May Allah protect us.

The temporal beauty that will only last a few days makes one go insane. After a few days, the contours of the face change and the features become unattractive in old age. How many youth have destroyed their lives due to this fatal illness!

Allah is fully aware of those who cast evil glances as is clearly stated in the Quran. Allah knows very well the doings of your eyes. Why did Allah express the act of casting evil glances with the word “San’at” (to make) in Surah Al-Mu’minun? The reason is that the one who casts lustful glances makes different images and pictures of the object of his desire in his mind. Sometimes he kisses in his imagination, at other times he embraces, and so on. Therefore, Allah mentioned that He is fully aware of all these different acts. Allamah Aalusi (RA) explains in his tafseer Ruh-ul-M’aani under four headings:

a) Allah is aware of how you maneuver your gaze and look with lustful eyes.

B) The one who casts evil glances uses all five senses. Allah is aware of all this. Allah is watching the use of his senses, in smelling, hearing and looking etc…

c) Allah is fully aware of the movements of all the limbs. Allah is watching how he uses his limbs to obtain and fulfill his desires.

d) Allah is aware of his final aim, which is adultery or fornication. This informative sentence has a threat concealed within it, that is, he will be punished severely.

I have come across many victims of evil glances and fantasizing throughout my life and all of them admitted that their lives were bitter, they lost sleep, they were anxious and uneasy, they were suicidal, their health deteriorated, their hearts were full of fear, they became physically and mentally weak. I always believed that these are various forms of punishment from Allah for this fascination and handing over one’s heart to anything or anyone other than Allah.

The attractive people that are walking around today on earth will one day be reduced to dirt in the grave. After their death, if you happen to open their graves, you will only find dirt. One might ask, “Where are the rosy cheeks, the red lips, the flowing hair, and the soft skin?” In the grave, it will all be the same. None of the body parts can be distinguished. Allah has placed beauty on in this “dirt” to see who will die for this temporal beauty and who will sacrifice their life for Allah and His messenger (Sallallahu Alaihi Wa Sallam). Had this glitter and glamor not been placed in this “dirt” then what test would there have been? Therefore, do not be deceived by this glamor.

-Bad Nigaahi Wa ‘Ishq-e-Majaazi ke Tabaah Kaariyaan Aur Unka ‘Ilaaj

(Evil Glances and Illicit Love: Harms and Cure)

SheikhOnDeRun
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May 09, 2007
:lol: :lol: :lol:

Do you actually believe that bullsh*t?
bschmidt
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May 10, 2007
^^People who had been indoctrinated do..
asc_26
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May 12, 2007
asc_26 wrote:^^People who had been indoctrinated do..

Indoctrinated in what????
SheikhOnDeRun
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May 12, 2007
Do you have to post this cut and paste garbage all the time. Can't you just give a simple opinion on something - just once.
Chocoholic
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May 13, 2007
This excerpt is not mine but of a different author. On almost all my other excerpts are where I have expressed my opinion in the introduction of the excerpts.
SheikhOnDeRun
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May 13, 2007
Have u evern believed or thought you could also be an expert.. if you allow yourself to think. Just beyond the teachings? Out of Box?
St.Lucifer
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May 18, 2007
St.Lucifer wrote:Have u evern believed or thought you could also be an expert.. if you allow yourself to think. Just beyond the teachings? Out of Box?

I have always thought outside the box or atleast try to. The fact that many of the excerpts I put show that I read several different books. I currently am in university. And universities teach you to think outside the box all the time when essay writing. Most of the excerpts I put are no doubt biased toward the religion of Islam. But then who can be free of bias. I have chosen to be a muslim not forced to be one.
SheikhOnDeRun
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May 18, 2007
If anyone wants to discuss on an intellectual basis on the excerpt I posted, then go ahead. No name calling.
(btw my posts are geared towards muslims, I know there are a lot of muslims on the forum just cause its dubai)
SheikhOnDeRun
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May 19, 2007
I can't concur that God provides temptations and then dishes out the punishment when someone falls short - especially when he created the temptations in the first place. I say this under the common denominator that most religions hold and that is that God created everything.

For instance if my Son was to steal some chocolate he would get disciplined - but I am not going to leave chocolate bars all around the house to tempt him and then punish him should he fail - its hardly going to help him when he is at that age where he wants to eat all the time.

My own personal opinion is that God is nothing like this and has never made up all these rules with strict punishments for those that fail.

He is more of a loving dad who understands are failings and loves us all the same no matter if we should stumble sometimes.

Here is my own personal belief on what God wants from us.

Are you ready for this - its quite a new concept;






























































Yep - Nothing :)

We were born perfect and everything we need is here and there is enough to go around for all, but instead we all wander through our lifes feeling something is missing and full of fear and fearful of god - when everything we need is already at the heart of us.

God bless :)
jabbajabba
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Jun 13, 2007
jabbajabba wrote:I can't concur that God provides temptations and then dishes out the punishment when someone falls short - especially when he created the temptations in the first place. I say this under the common denominator that most religions hold and that is that God created everything.

For instance if my Son was to steal some chocolate he would get disciplined - but I am not going to leave chocolate bars all around the house to tempt him and then punish him should he fail - its hardly going to help him when he is at that age where he wants to eat all the time.

My own personal opinion is that God is nothing like this and has never made up all these rules with strict punishments for those that fail.

He is more of a loving dad who understands are failings and loves us all the same no matter if we should stumble sometimes.

Here is my own personal belief on what God wants from us.

Are you ready for this - its quite a new concept;






























































Yep - Nothing :)

We were born perfect and everything we need is here and there is enough to go around for all, but instead we all wander through our lifes feeling something is missing and full of fear and fearful of god - when everything we need is already at the heart of us.

God bless :)

The battle between good and evil will always be there. We cannot blame our environment or society per say for the evil that we do. Because it is people that make society. Society is not an individual in itself. Your chocolate example is not free from error. Just because there are temptations all around us doesnt mean we should succumb to them. We have to rise above them. And this is the natural thing to do. People that were strong in willpower are those that made history whether they were muslim or non-muslim.

A human that is ruled by nothing but passion will lose his intellect. This is when passion exceeds equilibrium.

If we have desires (which are completely natural), then marriage is the route to go.

Marriage is the foundation of society. Lustful glances is the first step in breaking that foundation.
(Just get married and when you are driving with your wife in the car, you glance at another woman in a wrong way-I am sure your wife would not be happy with that)

Temptations are temptations. We decide what to do next.
SheikhOnDeRun
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Fear of hell is not a solution for anything Jul 31, 2007
Fear in any form cannot result in a lasting solution to any problem. Creating a fear of hell and punishment can only work for a short time.On the contrary one should strive to realise the fact that none of the external objects, persons and actions can give lasting happiness. Everything lasts only for a short time and it will end up agitating the mind. Agitation causes sufferring and takes us away from our true self- bliss.Remember fear in any form causes agitation and blind faith also leads to agitation ( human mind questions and there is no point in suppressing)
The fundamental problem that we face in our life is due to the ignorance of our true self and identifying us with our body, mind and intellect. These (BMI) are just instruments with their conditionings and we need to rise above these limitations.
coolspirit
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Aug 05, 2007
SheikhOnDeRun wrote:
The battle between good and evil will always be there. We cannot blame our environment or society per say for the evil that we do. Because it is people that make society. Society is not an individual in itself. Your chocolate example is not free from error. Just because there are temptations all around us doesnt mean we should succumb to them. We have to rise above them. And this is the natural thing to do. People that were strong in willpower are those that made history whether they were muslim or non-muslim.



Well I did not say we should succumb to every temptation did I? I simply stated that it is ludicrous for God to create natural drives which induce procreation to then dam us with eternal suffering for moments of weakness.

I agree that it is healthy for an individual to find balance amongst the array of human emotions that are experienced. So for example one extreme to me is to constantly be obsessed with sexual imagery and looking on every (man or woman) as being an object of sexual pleasure, the other extreme is to state that people will be resigned to fiery hell and damnation for succumbing to temptation - both of these are unhealthy mindsets to me.


A human that is ruled by nothing but passion will lose his intellect. This is when passion exceeds equilibrium.



I have never heard of any proof being shown that passion causes loss of intellect? How do you equate that?


If we have desires (which are completely natural), then marriage is the route to go.

Marriage is the foundation of society. Lustful glances is the first step in breaking that foundation.
(Just get married and when you are driving with your wife in the car, you glance at another woman in a wrong way-I am sure your wife would not be happy with that)

Temptations are temptations. We decide what to do next.


Well my wife has caught me looking a pretty women before - but she knows that I love her and need go no where else (apart from hell according to original post). At the same time she has 'wooed' when Will smith has been on TV. But we are secure in our relationship and so we can be open about this.

Promiscuity and two people unsuited for one another are the main causes of marriage break up. Love, understanding and compassion are the requisites for happy union - with or without marriage. I have seen plenty of dysfunctional relationships both in and out of marriage.
jabbajabba
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Re: Fear of hell is not a solution for anything Aug 05, 2007
coolspirit wrote:Fear in any form cannot result in a lasting solution to any problem. Creating a fear of hell and punishment can only work for a short time.On the contrary one should strive to realise the fact that none of the external objects, persons and actions can give lasting happiness. Everything lasts only for a short time and it will end up agitating the mind. Agitation causes sufferring and takes us away from our true self- bliss.Remember fear in any form causes agitation and blind faith also leads to agitation ( human mind questions and there is no point in suppressing)
The fundamental problem that we face in our life is due to the ignorance of our true self and identifying us with our body, mind and intellect. These (BMI) are just instruments with their conditionings and we need to rise above these limitations.


That sound like the teachings of the dharma?
jabbajabba
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Aug 06, 2007
based on Vedanta the non dual one!!!
coolspirit
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