Women Jokes

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Women Jokes Apr 13, 2007
I DO LOVE LADIES THO

Recently a "Husband Super Store" opened where women could go to choose a husband from among many men. It was laid out in seven floors, with the men increasing in positive attributes as you ascended. The only rule was, once you opened the door to any floor, you HAD to choose a man from that floor; if you went up a floor, you couldn't go back down except to leave the place, never to return. A couple of girlfriends went to the shopping centre to find some husbands...
First floor

The door had a sign saying, "These men have jobs and like kids." The women read the sign and said, "Well, that's better than not having a job or not liking kids, but I wonder what's further up?" So up they went.

Second floor

The sign read, "These men have high paying jobs, love kids, and are good looking." "Hmmm," said the ladies, "But, I wonder what's further up?"

Third floor

This sign read, "These men have high paying jobs, are extremely good looking, love kids and help with the housework." "Wow," said the women, "Very tempting." But there was another floor, so further up they went.

Fourth floor

This door had a sign saying "These men have high paying jobs, love kids, are extremely good looking, do all the housework and have a strong romantic streak." "Oh, mercy me," they cried, "Just think what must be awaiting us further on! So up to the fifth floor they went.

Fifth floor

The sign on that door said, "These men are rolling in money, love kids, are incredibly good looking, do all the housework, are incurable romantics, are fantastic chefs, completely faithful, are great conversationalists and really funny, use maps, and their mothers have passed away." "Now we're getting somewhere" they said, "but imagine what must be on the next floor." So up they went.

Sixth floor

The door had a sign saying "These men are rolling in money, love kids, are incredibly good looking, do all the housework, are incurable romantics, know how to satisfy you completely, are fantastic chefs, totally faithful, great conversationalists and really funny, would love to go shopping with you, use maps, put the toilet seat down and change the paper, and their mothers have passed away." "Pretty tempting" they said, "we really have to see what's on the next floor." They were so excited they ran up the stairs.

Seventh floor

The door had a sign saying "This floor is empty and exists only to prove that women are impossible to please. The exit is to your left, we hope you fall down the stairs."

:lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol:

kay1730
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Apr 13, 2007
old one
:wink:
alexandra
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Apr 13, 2007
Yeah...I think I heard this at least 5 years ago. It is a little funny, but I'm totally against sexist generalizations... for both sides. Some men think all women are stupid and selfish. Some women think of men the same.

We all have our good traits as well as our bad. That's all there is to it.
KageofSoul
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Apr 13, 2007
It is an old joke and it bases the axiom on the human nature of curiosity. I appreciate the attempt at uplifting the community, but this joke a little old, stale and subjective.

Furthermore I've never found any humour in it, sadly enough.
Purple Complex
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Apr 13, 2007
Purple Complex wrote:It is an old joke and it bases the axiom on the human nature of curiosity. I appreciate the attempt at uplifting the community, but this joke a little old, stale and subjective.

Furthermore I've never found any humour in it, sadly enough.


Much agreed. Multiple axioms derived from theory have been a common cause of distorted, misrepresented facts. Unfortunately, the majority take up these ideological concepts much too readily.
KageofSoul
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Apr 13, 2007
I'd say, the reader is very much open-minded even if he isn't aware of it. The foundation is clearly weak, but many may find some humour in the text, but in essence it's merely a battle of the genders self imposing falsehood which catches you off guard also known as a joke.
Purple Complex
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Apr 13, 2007
Purple Complex wrote:I'd say, the reader is very much open-minded even if he isn't aware of it. The foundation is clearly weak, but many may find some humour in the text, but in essence it's merely a battle of the genders self imposing falsehood which catches you off guard also known as a joke.


Have you ever laughed???
sage & onion
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Apr 14, 2007
That's going take me some time to get back to you on that one.
Purple Complex
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Apr 14, 2007
Purple Complex wrote:It is an old joke and it bases the axiom on the human nature of curiosity. I appreciate the attempt at uplifting the community, but this joke a little old, stale and subjective.

Furthermore I've never found any humour in it, sadly enough.


As you said its a joke. so it should not matter if it is old and subjective. a joke is a joke, nothing else.

Relax and enjoy life, you only live once :)
kay1730
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Apr 14, 2007
Actually, we live twice and the second one is eternal, so you may want to be careful what you do in the first, besides life isn't just about living.
Purple Complex
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Apr 14, 2007
Purple Complex wrote:Actually, we live twice and the second one is eternal, so you may want to be careful what you do in the first, besides life isn't just about living.


Hey PC, this is very deep, pray tell, what else is life about
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Apr 14, 2007
Purple Complex wrote:Actually, we live twice and the second one is eternal, so you may want to be careful what you do in the first, besides life isn't just about living.


Right. When did i say to you live your life. i said relax and enjoy. it seams like your putting words into my mouth.
kay1730
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Apr 14, 2007
kay1730 wrote:
Purple Complex wrote:Actually, we live twice and the second one is eternal, so you may want to be careful what you do in the first, besides life isn't just about living.


Right. When did i say to you live your life. i said relax and enjoy. it seams like your putting words into my mouth.


He didn't say you did say that. The last remark along with the adverb "besides" denotes an additional statement in reference to the topic bearing at hand, not a reiteration of what you said.

Gosh, kids are so undereducated these days.
KageofSoul
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Apr 14, 2007
KageofSoul wrote:
kay1730 wrote:
Purple Complex wrote:Actually, we live twice and the second one is eternal, so you may want to be careful what you do in the first, besides life isn't just about living.


Right. When did i say to you live your life. i said relax and enjoy. it seams like your putting words into my mouth.


He didn't say you did say that. The last remark along with the adverb "besides" denotes an additional statement in reference to the topic bearing at hand, not a reiteration of what you said.

Gosh, kids are so undereducated these days.


LOL, have to say your such a sad case. when was the last time you had a bit of fun? :?

And i really dont give a damn if u think im undereducated as your opinions dont matter.

I actually feel quite good about myself as i will be graduating with a law degree and im also a microsoft certified pro. Yes im bragging about it but i have a rite to do so. :)
kay1730
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Apr 14, 2007
kay1730 wrote:
KageofSoul wrote:
kay1730 wrote:
Purple Complex wrote:Actually, we live twice and the second one is eternal, so you may want to be careful what you do in the first, besides life isn't just about living.


Right. When did i say to you live your life. i said relax and enjoy. it seams like your putting words into my mouth.


He didn't say you did say that. The last remark along with the adverb "besides" denotes an additional statement in reference to the topic bearing at hand, not a reiteration of what you said.

Gosh, kids are so undereducated these days.


LOL, have to say your such a sad case. when was the last time you had a bit of fun? :?


My, my, what a presumptuous boy. Not only was that incoherent, but laced with primitive, vacuous perception. Truly a pitiful one you are...

And i really dont give a damn if u think im undereducated as your opinions dont matter.


Yeah true... if you gave a damn that you were undereducated, you would've made the effort to study.

I actually feel quite good about myself as i will be graduating with a law degree and im also a microsoft certified pro. Yes im bragging about it but i have a rite to do so. :)


Yet again, the wretched misfortune of groundless vanity. It's no wonder you fail to show even a modicum of intelligence.

Good luck my unfortunate friend. And may the force be with you ^_^
KageofSoul
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Apr 14, 2007
KageofSoul wrote:
kay1730 wrote:
KageofSoul wrote:
kay1730 wrote:
Purple Complex wrote:Actually, we live twice and the second one is eternal, so you may want to be careful what you do in the first, besides life isn't just about living.


Right. When did i say to you live your life. i said relax and enjoy. it seams like your putting words into my mouth.


He didn't say you did say that. The last remark along with the adverb "besides" denotes an additional statement in reference to the topic bearing at hand, not a reiteration of what you said.

Gosh, kids are so undereducated these days.


LOL, have to say your such a sad case. when was the last time you had a bit of fun? :?


My, my, what a presumptuous boy. Not only was that incoherent, but laced with primitive, vacuous perception. Truly a pitiful one you are... I actually feel sorry for you as its obvious you spend your time getting into arguments with people probably half your age. And im not presuming that, youve come across like that.
And i really dont give a damn if u think im undereducated as your opinions dont matter.


Yeah true... if you gave a damn that you were undereducated, you would've made the effort to study. I said i dont give a damn about u thinkin im undereducated, i sugest you improve your reading skills. Calling me undereducated when you cant read yourself. Your such a disgrace.
I actually feel quite good about myself as i will be graduating with a law degree and im also a microsoft certified pro. Yes im bragging about it but i have a rite to do so. :)


Yet again, the wretched misfortune of groundless vanity. It's no wonder you fail to show even a modicum of intelligence. lol, groundless vainity you know. i like the way you phrased that, well done. But what a shame, your opinions aint worth a penny to me. Yes im vain, u can call me arrogant iswell. you see im good at what i do and the way i do it so i have evry rite to be the above, and trust me its not groundless.
Good luck my unfortunate friend. And may the force be with you ^_^ Friend? When did i become your friend, i dont like losers. And yes finally your right, i am unfortunate for having to reply to your posts. So ive decided im gonna let you carry on barking. Have a nice day 8)
kay1730
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Apr 14, 2007
kay1730 wrote:I actually feel sorry for you as its obvious you spend your time getting into arguments with people probably half your age. And im not presuming that, youve come across like that.


You don't presume so... well good. Half my age... well that explains everything... you're only 9. Pretty smart for a 9 year old ^_^


I said i dont give a damn about u thinkin im undereducated, i sugest you improve your reading skills. Calling me undereducated when you cant read yourself. Your such a disgrace.


The fact that I can write... denotes the ability to read. Even a 9 year old should know that... how very sad.


lol, groundless vainity you know. i like the way you phrased that, well done. But what a shame, your opinions aint worth a penny to me. Yes im vain, u can call me arrogant iswell. you see im good at what i do and the way i do it so i have evry rite to be the above, and trust me its not groundless.


Self elevation... weightless blabbering.

Friend? When did i become your friend, i dont like losers. And yes finally your right, i am unfortunate for having to reply to your posts. So ive decided im gonna let you carry on barking. Have a nice day 8)


Well we can only hope the all the misfortune in your sorrowful life comes to an end and that one day you'll be able to find a friend.

Vain and arrogant, incompetent and foolish, young and worthless but at least you believe in your self.

Let's all give this guy a hand, it's not always a bad thing... deceiving yourself ^_^
KageofSoul
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Apr 14, 2007
Kage thanks, but I can defend myself you know.

Furthermore...

kay1730 wrote:
Purple Complex wrote:Actually, we live twice and the second one is eternal, so you may want to be careful what you do in the first, besides life isn't just about living.


Right. When did i say to you live your life. i said relax and enjoy. it seams like your putting words into my mouth.


Yes it would seem (seam) that way to you.
Purple Complex
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Apr 14, 2007
Purple Complex wrote:Kage thanks, but I can defend myself you know.

Furthermore...

kay1730 wrote:
Purple Complex wrote:Actually, we live twice and the second one is eternal, so you may want to be careful what you do in the first, besides life isn't just about living.


Right. When did i say to you live your life. i said relax and enjoy. it seams like your putting words into my mouth.


Yes it would seem (seam) that way to you.


Lol alright... I just couldn't help but rectify the idiosyncrasies. Though all in all... he seams liek a kool gai.
KageofSoul
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Apr 14, 2007
KageofSoul wrote:
kay1730 wrote:I actually feel sorry for you as its obvious you spend your time getting into arguments with people probably half your age. And im not presuming that, youve come across like that.


You don't presume so... well good. Half my age... well that explains everything... you're only 9. Pretty smart for a 9 year old ^_^


I said i dont give a damn about u thinkin im undereducated, i sugest you improve your reading skills. Calling me undereducated when you cant read yourself. Your such a disgrace.


The fact that I can write... denotes the ability to read. Even a 9 year old should know that... how very sad.


lol, groundless vainity you know. i like the way you phrased that, well done. But what a shame, your opinions aint worth a penny to me. Yes im vain, u can call me arrogant iswell. you see im good at what i do and the way i do it so i have evry rite to be the above, and trust me its not groundless.


Self elevation... weightless blabbering.

Friend? When did i become your friend, i dont like losers. And yes finally your right, i am unfortunate for having to reply to your posts. So ive decided im gonna let you carry on barking. Have a nice day 8)


Well we can only hope the all the misfortune in your sorrowful life comes to an end and that one day you'll be able to find a friend.

Vain and arrogant, incompetent and foolish, young and worthless but at least you believe in your self.

Let's all give this guy a hand, it's not always a bad thing... deceiving yourself ^_^


F.U.C.K.I.N H.E.L.L your still barking. So what next, u want a blue peter badge now. Actually youve made my day a bit more funny, your small talk really makes me laugh. well you see your not pissing me off im just laughing at your expense. Whatever you say dont effect me so just carry on, im happy listening to an ediots point of view.

Oh yea, even HP has more sense then you.
kay1730
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Apr 14, 2007
kay1730 wrote:F.U.C.K.I.N H.E.L.L your still barking. So what next, u want a blue peter badge now. Actually youve made my day a bit more funny, your small talk really makes me laugh. well you see your not pissing me off im just laughing at your expense. Whatever you say dont effect me so just carry on, im happy listening to an ediots point of view.


You know, that moment when you laugh and swear at the top of your voice, that's called anger.

He's obviously made you VERY angry.

You need to cool off.
Purple Complex
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Apr 14, 2007
Purple Complex wrote:
kay1730 wrote:F.U.C.K.I.N H.E.L.L your still barking. So what next, u want a blue peter badge now. Actually youve made my day a bit more funny, your small talk really makes me laugh. well you see your not pissing me off im just laughing at your expense. Whatever you say dont effect me so just carry on, im happy listening to an ediots point of view.


You know, that moment when you laugh and swear at the top of your voice, that's called anger.

He's obviously made you VERY angry.

You need to cool off.


Yeah... poor guy. Hopefully he'll get over it over time. Hang in there... kay?
KageofSoul
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Apr 14, 2007
Purple Complex wrote:
kay1730 wrote:F.U.C.K.I.N H.E.L.L your still barking. So what next, u want a blue peter badge now. Actually youve made my day a bit more funny, your small talk really makes me laugh. well you see your not pissing me off im just laughing at your expense. Whatever you say dont effect me so just carry on, im happy listening to an ediots point of view.


You know, that moment when you laugh and swear at the top of your voice, that's called anger.

He's obviously made you VERY angry.

You need to cool off.


I geuss you got a hot spot for kage. howcome youve started to speak in his defence. Why dont you two just chat in the romance forum, im sure they accept gays.
kay1730
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Apr 14, 2007
kay1730 wrote:I geuss you got a hot spot for kage. howcome youve started to speak in his defence. Why dont you two just chat in the romance forum, im sure they accept gays.


No, gays are still frowned upon in all society today. Acceptance and social opinion are two different things. Besides if we really wanted to talk we could easily use the private message system.

But if you really want to know, Kage isn't my type.

I'm the kind of person that prefers those people with the soft voice, long hair and pretty dresses. It maybe hard to understand for someone like you to understand. Most of us call them women, you might call them friends.
Purple Complex
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Apr 14, 2007
I knew Kay was a little uh... funny. But I didn't know he thinks about men like this. Man... I feel sick now o_o
KageofSoul
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Apr 14, 2007
Purple Complex wrote:
kay1730 wrote:I geuss you got a hot spot for kage. howcome youve started to speak in his defence. Why dont you two just chat in the romance forum, im sure they accept gays.


No, gays are still frowned upon in all society today. Acceptance and social opinion are two different things. Besides if we really wanted to talk we could easily use the private message system.

But if you really want to know, Kage isn't my type.

I'm the kind of person that prefers those people with the soft voice, long hair and pretty dresses. It maybe hard to understand for someone like you to understand. Most of us call them women, you might call them friends.


HAHAHAHAHA. Shutup gay boy, why you covering up.
kay1730
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Apr 14, 2007
TO Kage of soul and Purple complex(gays),

Well im off now, gonna go and enjoy my saturday night. Thanks for all the entertainment, dont worry youll get better. Have fun chating online and getting bored. such a sad life, i pity both of you. :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: 8) 8) 8) 8) 8) :lol: :lol:
kay1730
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Apr 14, 2007
kay1730 wrote:
Purple Complex wrote:
kay1730 wrote:I geuss you got a hot spot for kage. howcome youve started to speak in his defence. Why dont you two just chat in the romance forum, im sure they accept gays.


No, gays are still frowned upon in all society today. Acceptance and social opinion are two different things. Besides if we really wanted to talk we could easily use the private message system.

But if you really want to know, Kage isn't my type.

I'm the kind of person that prefers those people with the soft voice, long hair and pretty dresses. It maybe hard to understand for someone like you to understand. Most of us call them women, you might call them friends.


HAHAHAHAHA. Shutup gay boy, why you covering up.


Please man... I don't like being hit on by guys. This is the only thing I'll beg of you.

I'm not interested in you, so find another guy.
KageofSoul
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Apr 14, 2007
kay1730 wrote:HAHAHAHAHA. Shutup gay boy, why you covering up.


Well if I was gay, I would be covering up because of the societal image it would create, but as I am not and also that the accusation of being gay is merely one of your many fantasies you've displayed on here. I'm simply saying, you may want to re-assess your judgement, but if not... No harm done. Coming from a guy that labeled someone as a dog and started barking, I wouldn't be surprised if you label people gay and then...
Purple Complex
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Apr 14, 2007
Yeah... I think the whole board would prefer that he keep his sexual fantasies to himself. No one else swings that way...
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