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Why do men beat their wives???


Nick81 First let's not limit this to "muslim" men. This is found in all countries, irrespective of religion. Second, the reason women who are victim of physical or even moral abuse from pencil-dic*ed jacka$$es often refuse the help of others and will not go to the police is because they often depend fully on their husbands/partners or they fear that their children will be the one who pay the harshest price... It's far from being a simple issue unfortunately... Those women need the support of friends or professional help. In the US, Europe there are organizations, even hotlines who will provide moral support and guidance to such women. I seriously doubt this exist in the UAE... But I think what we must fight more than anything is when a woman actually convince herself that she DESERVES the "punishment" she is getting...
sarahtech Why do men beat their wives??? :shock: bonitta coz they are loosers and afraid to beat someone stronger than they are bushra21 does your husband beat you? asc_26 Because they are Moody Men! :wink: sage & onion Well I think the question should be; why do SOME men............. Casue I don't bushra21
thats always a good thing to know.
gives me hope that there are decent husbands out there asc_26 He must be a sadist. Some men are like that..ladies, call the police and put them in jail. mema or better pay a ganster like jamal to beat him up :twisted: sage & onion
Jamal, Gangster, he couldn't beat an egg :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol:

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bonitta or leave them asc_26 Ladies, Women...any female species.. we dont deserve to be beaten you know, unless you want to.~~masochist, did i spell it right?~~ sarahtech Not me,but my neighbour and she acceped. :wink: bushra21 she allows her husband to beat her? what...doesnt she have kids that can stand up for her if she cant do it herself? asc_26
That's the problem with women - they allow it to happen to them. They swear in marriage to love each not to beat each other. :roll: :roll: sarahtech When I worked at the apartment complex, myself and co-workers heard muslim men beating their wives. We called police many times but nothing would ever happen. The women would come to the door a say that nothing happened and the police would leave. There are documented disturbance calls when we were not on the grounds, and still the women would send away the police. weary_heart ...because women accept it. Leave your man. St.Lucifer Coz the dickhead, brain dead, bastards dont get it back.. the simple reason... coz they are fools. St.Lucifer
hahahahahaha :P :twisted: dont let the gangsta see dis.. :)
bear it's how the lesser forms of the male gender express anger, distaste, or superiority. I have no respect for anyone male or female that throws a punch intending to do harm and not out of self defence. But I do have a question... Why is it that women go on and on about equal rights for the genders, but when it comes to marital/relationship abuse the reply is always "Men have no right to hit women"? As far as I see it, no one ever has the right to hit anyone. Men shouldn't hit women or other men, women should hit men or other women. Unless it is in self defence. believe me, if a woman came at me with a frying pan (it's just an example, I'm not placing a stereotype), I would try to get it away from her or subduing her first (as i would with a man attacking me with any weapon). But if i couldn't, I wouldn't give a second though about knocking her out. But then I've known some pretty tough women in my time, some very good fighters. But Why do women cry out about equal rights, but then all they have to say about being attacked is "a MAN doesn't have the RIGHT to hit a WOMAN"? If your going to go on about equal right (which belive it or not, I'm in favor of) shouldn't the argument have some continuity? Statements like the one I am questioning, set a double standard which is no better than whats going on now. And it's not the only one, the one about men always having to pay for dinner (Yes, women sometimes offer. As infrequent as it is, they still do. But men still hold this macho "I'm not a man if she pays" idiocy) is another one but thats for another post. :D kanelli Bear, these women who believe in women's rights don't believe it is fair for a woman to hit a man either. It is a given! The majority of the cases of abuse are men beating their women so that is why they say a man has no right to beat a woman. I can't believe I even have to explain this. :roll: bear It's true that most cases are men beating women, but there are a staggering about of them in which women are battering men. The cases of Women emotionally abusing men is even higher that the combined number of beating cases. But I think you misunderstood me. My quarrel is with the choice of words used to make the argument. It's it is equal rights you want, then let your words reflect what you want without any room for misunderstanding. EDIT (forgot to mention) And another thing, Why is it that when it happens in the western world they say women's rights are being broken, but anywhere else it's called Human rights? They deal with the same subject matter, the rights of human beings that are being violated. devilsdiciple
+2 for Bear!!!! Chocoholic True K, however on the flip-side, how many men will actually come forward and admit to being victims of abuse by their other halves? Not many I'm. And yes no-one should beat on anyone else. Many women are afraid to leave abusive partners, they think they deserve it and associate it with attention and believe it or not love and affection, many think they will never find a 'nice' guy, so they put up with it. kanelli Yes Bear, you have a good point - the language could be used more accurately. Chocs, you have a point too. I know of some cases where the men have been battered and don't want to talk about it or report it to authorities. I don't necessarily agree that verbal abuse is more likely to happen to men than women, or vice versa. It could very well happen equally. It depends on the people and the relationship. ^ian^ I beat women.... in scrabble :D But seriously, anyone that beats down another person with physical violence is a moron and needs to be removed from the gene pool. I have seen women beat their husbands too, it's just shit. bear
Personally I would reckon the opposite, The reason you hear more about men beating women is because thats how the man expresses himself. There are cases you don't hear about for the reasons choc stated.
I would imagine that just as many women emotionally or verbally abuse men as men who beat women. The reason you don't hear about it, I reckon, is for the same reasons that women don't admit to being beaten. But it is inflamed by a man's need to be the alpha.
I've been in that kind of relationship, I've told very few of it. Mainly because I was afraid that people would see me as less of a man. Nosferatu When a man beats his wife its the lowest level to which he can go.... u shud just take a baseball bat or something at him.... weary_heart
I know one guy (in my friend's company) - one time when he went to their office, he got black eye! (his wife beat him - his wife is Russian) Scare Face Look where we live- its a CULTURAL NORM, its been happening for generations mothers tell there duaghter its ok, duaghter see there father beat there mothers and there mothers make excuses, say it was my fault... ALL I KNOW I WOULD BRAKE MY FATHERS NECK IF HE TOUCHED MY MOTHER zam Ok ok scare face, we understand your feeling. relax ok? But I dunno where you from, here in Dubai I dont believe its a "cultural norm" as you call it. Lay one finger here on anyone and you'd say buh bye! bushra21
ummm, no woman in my entire family (from my mums side...excluding her unfortunately) has ever even had a man lay a finger in a negative way on them...they are worshipped by their husbands, fathers, brothers....
and it is most definately NOT a cultural norm here...my fiance has never even raised his voice on me...and trust me...ive given him plenty of reason to do so..
so think about what you just said before you go and accuse others of what you think...especially if its wrong kanelli worshipped? bushra21
lol...kind of...i mean, if you saw they way they were treated you would think so.... zam Its nice to sometimes be treated like a princess, or a shaikah in this region :lol: island_sands Domestic violence is a worldwide occurence, not only with Muslim cultures. I was brought up in South Africa for 10 years of my life and saw many a South African couple beat each other or just one sided, mainly due to influence of alcohol. In fact, the divorce rate in SA is amongst the highest in the world, and of the six different countries i have lived in, the South African men rate among the highest in my opinion for treating their women badly.No offence meant here to any SA men on this forum, it's just my observation. There is a shelter for women to go to in the UAE, i saw an article about it in a magazine last year. You can also call Al Ameen and get help. ,Article_000214,1,&_nfpb=true&_pageLabel=view Your calls are kept confidential. Dont accept violence against you, and never believe it's your fault. No matter how heated the argument, walk away, dont beat her/him. You degrade yourself and the relationship, and lose respect for each other. My heart goes out to your neighbour - there is no excuse for it. you often hear women say "but i love him and when he is sweet he is wonderful". That kind of "self-convincing" is dangerous and the woman will always be under his power. Get help and get it soon. asc_26
What a prowess... very well said. We need someone like you in DF! :wink: Kashif Khan its women fault,why she don't tell to police clearly? And i really hate who beat the wife,Wife is like a beautiful flower,I am still single but my feelings always positive for wives. Burken Kashif Khan
Haha. It's enough you are brining up an old thread, but then you write it's
womans fault so I just had to comment you and say; you are funny. asc_26 He's funny and maybe bored. But he compares women to a flower. Poor Women. :D Dubai Knight Beating is wrong, either way. Some women get their own back in rather radical ways: Remember John Wayne Bobbett? Ouch! :shock: :shock: :shock: Knight Burken "agreed that ration in muslims is higher." That's bull. But you are at least trying to fill in with something smart to write, it just stopped when you came to that sentence. abdalrasheed Men beats wives / women regardless of thier religion. agreed that ration in muslims is higher. Beating any one regardless of sex is not good. if something bothers you or annoying you stay away from it. abdalrasheed in some cases beating of women are justifying but there are lot of other ways to handle them. Beating is not the solution. Beating will worsens the situation asc_26
What is the solution then? :D kanelli Some men say they "love and respect women", until their woman pisses them off. Then it becomes the woman's fault for upsetting him and causing him to harm her. There is always an excuse. :roll: bushra21

so do you have any statistics proving that beatings occur more when muslims are concerned?
also, how can you say that beating someone is justified? what situations would deem a justified beating?
other than those two things...you make a good point. Burken I hope he is a muslim, cause otherwise what he says can't be true! bushra21
Even if he is a Muslim, doesn't make what he says true. Burken "in some cases beating of women are justifying" + "agreed that ration in muslims is higher" = He must be muslim! pitbulero I am married and not even once laid my hand on my wife. If you can notice man who beats their wife most of them are under the influence of drugs or alcohol their wife stays at home doing household chores. Some of the men beat their wife because of jealousy they are thinking that the wife is always at home and maybe is cheating on them dickass attitude. My question is do you know someone a wife who is working and earning money for her family got beaten by the husband? Because I know someone his a guy not working because their company had recession and he was the one taking care of their children because the wife told him instead of paying a nanny maybe the husband will be the one to drive the children in school and go buy groceries. It tooks years with that situation and the wife started bragging that shes the one providing for the family this and that, the husband could do anything because he is not earning any cents then the guy got pissed off and started throwing foul language the wife got irritated and throw kitchenwares to the husband and the guy never fought back because he again realizes that the wife is the one providing for the family. I don't know if this situation would help in realizing that not only some men beats their wife but also some wife beats their men. Jamal so you dont do no drugs ???? cause thats a damnn shame homie ... i mean MARY J be da drug of peace ... so smoke that herb an continue admirin ur woman even if she aint fine .. u feel me .. hahaha.. yea im on it .. damn its bionic though it aint chronic . pitbulero Drugs? I have tried that when I was in College smokin hemps, but now I'm married Why should I, But I do drink and smoke, I did got too drunk whats the difference anyway? If your a user here in our country you can't get drivers license, police clearance, and couldn't find a decent job because we have a drug testing here before entering a new job or renewing drivers license how can I drive my car? mighty.one
do you seriously have to get drug tested before getting a job? Bleakus well you do a medical check up and a blood test before you can get a job, every company requires it dubai_sale this is why men beat their wives..... coz they change the topic and act smart... sometimes its the only way they ever understand... sage & onion
Now this is a real sweety :shock: :shock: :shock: :shock: bushra21 back off sage...ive been trying to get this one for a while now.... i know i know, why bother when i could have any guy i want. well....hes different :oops: Bleakus
:lol: :lol: :lol: jabbajabba Unfortunately it is something that is passed down over generations and becomes embedded in the families psyche (its the same with alcoholism and child abuse and many other issues). It takes someone very strong and progressive to break the cycle of dysfunction. I was really lucky to have been raised in a family without domestic violence abuse in the home. As I grew up in this environment - I learned instinctively not to hit a women, but had it been part of my daily environment - would I be the same? I can say 'yes' being who I am, but only because I am the result of what formed me as a person. I remember a friend of mine back home - who i would say was the same as myself, for him to hit a women or someone who cannot defend themselves is something you never did - ever!. He is a big guy and can handle himself well. Once in a club he saw a guy punching the back of girls head while holding her arm in a bad position. He went over and lamped the guys chin knocking him out cold on the floor. Five seconds later the girlfriend (as we found out later) smashed a bottle over the back of his head screaming leave him alone. Most people who experience violence from a partner - will leave. Unfortunately there are some who see it as part of family life - who will always stay and accept it. They need a lot of help and counseling to get over this. jabbajabba
Beardude - you have made good point here..
My lady is always moaning at me to not leave the toilet seat up after i have taken a pee. I always say to her "you need it down, i need it up" we are both 'equally' capable of lifting or dropping the toilet seat :)
However...
I am over 6ft, I weigh about 200 pounds (i like my food a bit to much), i don't bruise easily and (i am ashamed to admit) used to enjoy a drunken punch up with other lads in my younger twenties.
My missus is 5ft 4, shes bruises easily, her bones are not as strong as mine and she is less physically strong - this is not an 'equal' footing.
For me to take her on in a fight - it would not be equal.
She is also my princess and i could not dream of hurting her - but thats off the point i am making.
She is a lot smarter then me (I hope she is not reading this) so when it came to study - we both had an equal chance to learn and do well. She exceeded and got her masters. I played around and could not be bothered to put a lot into to study so did not make much of the opportunity. But we both had an 'equal' chance.
I have probably gone off your point and misquoted now - if so apologies where there due. faispro
I felt offended by your remark. What/who give you the right to make generic statement representing muslims like that? Do you have figures and statistic? Or do you base it from your personal sphere of observation which is limited to Pakistanis,Indians and Arab muslims while conveniently neglecting one big majority group of muslims that belong to the Malay archipelago (south east asia ..that is Malaysia,Indonesia,Brunei,Phillipines,Thailand and our neighbors.) Indonesia alone is known as the most populous Muslim nation in the world.
Your statement do not do justice to me who never laid my hands on my wife nor my siblings, nor my parents and their siblings and my grand parents and their siblings.
We too have marriage problems and broken marriages but one sided violence are not common in our culture and not tolerated by law or the families of the couples.
It boils down to EDUCATION and PATIENCE ! Unknown Devil Best is dont get married!! Galactico guys who beat there wives are losers they too scared to fight a guy so they pick on a woman tinkerbella because they got nothing better to do!! which is quite sad!! faispro
Not really, guys who beat up their wives also includes guys who likes to fight. In fact ..they fight everyone !.
I observe guys who resort to violence are normally at their wits end in a verbal or civilised argument..i.e when they think they are right but unable to argue it... coupled with temper and ego or alcohol... which roots from poor upbringing.
If you don't want your children to grow up beating their wife, don't beat your wife or any women (like your maid) in front of them! Duh! Tropic23
You are so right!!!!
They are big losers :!: Siwash
I agree, but why is this being discussed and given so much attention on the Romance forum. It seems contradictory to say the least. Globetrotter DEADLY DOMESTIC VIOLENCE 30 percent of female murder victims were killed by an intimate partner from 1976 to 2004. 3 percent of male murder victims were killed by an intimate partner in the same period. SOURCE: US Bureau of Justice Statistics bear
Granted, I know your situation. I am not unlike yourself in stature. My main reason for my previous post was playing the role of devil's advocate for the furtherance of the discussion. Not spewing my own beliefs. I have never raised a hand to a woman in anger. Quite frankly if I did, I would be more ashamed of myself than anyone could imagine.

Don't worry mate, this most often the case. Myself included.

I understand that there are many things in this world that are "equal rights" . My main argument is that wife/woman beating by men is not something that falls into the category of equal rights. They are Civil rights disputes, and civil rights are under fire (so to speak) regardless of race, creed, or gender. Placing "beatings" into the category of "Equal rights" is a distraction from problems that actually fit the category.
Thanks for your reply, please feel free to call me down on anything you think I've overstepped a boundary on. I'm all for keeping discussion alive. :D Deniz Weak men beat their wives and poor woman accepts this. Tropic23
I can`t understand, why so many women stay with a man who hit them.
:roll:
Wake up!!!
Leave these deadbeats :!: Deniz
Right.
Acording to 1 questionnaire searching, educational men beat their wife more than uneducated men. It s suprising!
If my hubby try to it ( it s not possible :)) i never look back and go on my way :p Unknown Devil
Ur Married??? :shock: Deniz
Why u so shocked? mcbrite I think the thread-title is strange in itself... I don't think you should call somebody that has to beat his wife to get respect a man in the first place.... Lowlife animal, maybe, but "man"? Tropic23
:thumbleft: Galactico
way to go sis 8)



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