G
:) :)
Yo momma so fat when her beeper went off, people thought she
was
backing up.....
> > > <LI>Yo momma so fat her nickname is "DAMN"
> > > <li>Yo momma so fat she eats Wheat Thicks
> > > <li>Yo momma so fat we're in her right now
> > > <li>Yo momma so fat people jog around her for exercise
> > > <li>Yo momma so fat she went to the movies and sat next to
everyone
> > > <li>Yo momma so fat she has been declared a natural habitat for
Condors
> > > <li>Yo momma so fat you haveta roll over twice to get off her...
> > > <li>Yo momma so fat she was floating in the ocean and Spain
claimed her for
> > > the new world
> > > <li>Yo momma so fat she lay on the beach and people run around
yelling Free
> > > Willy
> > > <li>Yo momma so fat when you get on top of her your ears pop!
> > > <li>Yo momma so fat when she has sex, she has to give
directions!
> > > <li>Yo momma so fat she goes to a resturant, looks at the menu
and says
> > > "okay!"
> > > <li>Yo momma so fat when she wears a yellow raincoat, people say
"Taxi!"
> > > <li>Yo momma so fat she had to go to Sea World to get baptized
> > > <li>Yo momma so fat she has to iron her pants on the driveway
> > > <li>Yo momma so fat she puts on her lipstick with a paint-roller
> > > <li>Yo momma so fat she has to pull down her pants to get into
her pockets
> > > <li>Yo momma so fat when she tripped over on 4th Ave, she landed
on 12th
> > > <li>Yo momma so fat when she bungee jumps, she brings down the
bridge too
> > > <li>Yo momma so fat the highway patrol made her wear "Caution!
Wide Turn" on
> > > her butt
> > > <li>Yo momma so fat when she sits around the house, she SITS
AROUND THE HOUSE!
> > > <li>Yo momma so fat when she steps on a scale, it reads "one at
a time,
> > > please"
> > > <li>Yo momma so fat when she sits on my face I can't hear the
stereo.
> > > <li>Yo momma so fat she fell in love and broke it.
> > > <li>Yo momma so fat when she gets on the scale it says "to be
continued"
> > > <li>Yo momma so fat when she gets on the scale it says "we don't
do livestock"
> > > <li>Yo momma so fat her neck looks like a pair of hot dogs!
> > > <li>Yo momma so fat she's got her own area code!
> > > <li>Yo momma so fat she looks like she's smuggling a Volkswagen!
> > > <li>Yo momma so fat God couldn't light Earth till she moved!
> > > <li>Yo momma so fat NASA has to orbit a satellite around her!
> > > <li>Yo momma so fat whenever she goes to the beach the tide
comes in!
> > > <li>Yo momma so fat when she plays hopscotch, she goes New York,
L.A.,
> > > Chicago...
> > > <li>Yo momma so fat she's got Amtrak written on her leg.
> > > <li>Yo momma so fat even Bill Gates couldn't pay for her
liposuction!
> > > <li>Yo momma so fat her legs are like spoiled milk - white &
chunky!
> > > <li>Yo momma so fat you have to roll her in flour and look for
the wet spot to
> > > fuck her!
> > > <li>Yo momma so fat I had to take a train and two buses just to
get on the
> > > bitches good side!
> > > <li>Yo momma so fat she wakes up in sections!
> > > <li>Yo momma so fat when she goes to an amusement park, people
try to ride
> > > HER!
> > > <li>Yo momma so fat she sat on a quarter and a booger shot out
of George
> > > Washington's nose.
> > > <li>Yo momma so fat she was mistaken for God's bowling ball!
> > > <li>Yo momma so fat she rolled over 4 quarters and it made a
dollar!
> > > <li>Yo momma so fat when she lies on the beach no one else gets
sun!
> > > <li>Yo momma so fat when she bungee jumps she goes straight to
hell!
> > > <li>Yo momma so fat when she jumps up in the air she gets
stuck!!!
> > > <li>Yo momma so fat she's got more Chins than a Hong Kong phone
book!
> > > <li>Yo momma so fat that her senior pictures had to be arial
views!
> > > <li>Yo momma so fat she's on both sides of the family!
> > > <li>Yo momma so fat everytime she walks in high heels, she
strikes oil!
> > > <li>Yo momma so fat she fell and made the Grand Canyon!
> > > <li>Yo momma so fat she sat on the beach and Greenpeace threw
her in!
> > > <li>Yo momma so fat that when she hauls ass, she has to make two
trips!
> > > <li>Yo momma so fat even her clothes have stretch marks!
> > > <li>Yo momma so fat she has a wooden leg with a kickstand!
> > > <li>Yo momma so fat she has to use a VCR as a beeper!
> > > <li>Yo momma so fat she broke her leg, and gravy poured out!
> > > <li>Yo momma so fat when she rides in a hot air balloon, it
looks like she's
> > > wearin tights!
> > > <li>Yo momma so fat she got hit by a parked car!
> > > <li>Yo momma so fat they have to grease the bath tub to get her
out!
> > > <li>Yo momma so fat she has a run in her blue-jeans!
> > > <li>Yo momma so fat they use the elastic in her underwear for
bungee jumping
> > > <li>Yo momma so fat when they used her underwear elastic for
bungee jumping,
> > > they hit the ground.
> > > <li>Yo momma so fat when she backs up she beeps.
> > > <li>Yo momma so fat she has to buy two airline tickets.
> > > <li>Yo momma so fat when she fell over she rocked herself asleep
trying to get
> > > up again.
> > > <li>Yo momma so fat she influences the tides.
> > > <li>Yo momma so fat that when I tried to drive around her I ran
out of gas.
> > > <li>Yo momma so fat the animals at the zoo feed her.
> > > <li>Yo momma so fat she was baptized at Marine World.
> > > <li>Yo momma so fat when she dances at a concert the whole band
skips.
> > > <li>Yo momma so fat the AIDS quilt wouldn't cover her
> > > <li>Yo momma so fat she stands in two time zones.
> > > <li>Yo momma so fat you have to grease the door frame and hold a
twinkie on
> > > the other side just to get her through
> > > <li>Yo momma so fat when the bitch goes to an all you can eat
buffet, they
> > > have to install speed bumps.
> > > <li>Yo momma so fat that she cant tie her own shoes.
> > > <li>Yo momma so fat sets off car alarms when she runs.
> > > <li>Yo momma so fat she cant reach her back pocket.
> > > <li>Yo momma so fat when she wears a Malcom X T-shirt,
helicopters try to land
> > > on her back!
> > > <li>Yo momma so fat she uses redwoods to pick her teeth
> > > <li>Yo momma so fat the only pictures you have of her are
satellite pictures
> > > <li>Yo momma so fat she put on some BVD's and by the time they
reached her
> > > waist they spelled out boulevard.
> > > <li>Yo momma so fat she stepped on a rainbow and made Skittles.
> > > <li>Yo momma so fat she uses a mattress for a tampon.
> > > <li>Yo momma so fat that when she sits on the beach, Greenpeace
shows up and
> > > tries to tow her back into the ocean.....
> > > <li>Yo momma so fat that she would have been in E.T., but when
she rode the
> > > bike across the moon, the bitch caused an eclipse.
> > > <li>Yo momma so fat she hoola-hooped the super bowl.
> > > <li>Yo momma so fat she was baptised in the ocean.
> > > <li>Yo momma so fat they tie a rope around her shoulders and
drag her through
> > > a tunnel when they want to clean it.
> > > <li>Yo momma so fat when she got hit by a bus, she said, "Who
threw that
> > > rock?"
> > > <li>Yo momma so fat when she stands in a left-turn lane it gives
her the green
> > > arrow!
> > > <li>Yo momma so fat that when she was born, she gave the
hospital stretch
> > > marks
> > > <li>Yo momma so fat the National Weather Agency has to assign
names to her
> > > farts!!!
> > > <li>Yo momma so fat we went to the drive-in and didn't have to
pay because we
> > > dressed her as a Chevrolet.
> > > <li>Yo momma so fat she was Miss Arizona -- class Battleship
> > > <li>Yo momma so fat she accidently got a 747 caught in her teeth
> > > <li>Yo momma so fat to her "light food" means under 4 Tons
> > > <li>Yo momma so fat The Himalayas are practice runs to prepare
for her
> > > <li>Yo momma so fat she went on a date with high heels on and
came back with
> > > sandals!!!
> > > <li>Yo momma so fat she stepped on a talking scale and it told
her to get the
> > > fuck off!!!
> > > <li>Yo momma so fat and stupid, her waist size is larger than
her IQ!!!
> > > <li>Yo momma so fat she was zoned for commercial development
> > > <li>Yo momma so fat she won "Miss Bessie the Cow 94"
> > > <li>Yo momma so fat she has her own brand of jeans: FA - FatAss
Jeans
> > > <li>Yo momma so fat she has more rolls than a mary jane truck
> > > <li>Yo momma so fat she has her own zip code.
> > > <li>Yo momma so fat she wears two watches because she's in two
time zones!
> > > <li>Yo momma so fat She thought gravy was a beverage
> > > <li>Yo momma so fat we went to Mt. Rushmore and didnt know who's
face to sit
> > > on
> > > <li>Yo momma so fat I took her to dinner and the waitress took
her order in
> > > shorthand
> > > <li>Yo momma so fat she had to get out of bed to roll over
> > > <li>Yo momma so fat Thanksgiving day she ate dinner for 6 hours,
then said "I
> > > am going to walk this meal off" I said "Call me when you get to
Brazil"
> > > <li>Yo momma so fat she has to wear a hat with a blinking red
light to scare
> > > off the airplanes
> > > <li>Yo momma so fat she reminds me of a toilet bowl! short,
round, full of
> > > water and full of shit!
> > > <li>Yo momma so fat that she may collapse under her own gravity
and form a new
> > > black hole. Not even light will escape!
> > > <li>Yo momma so fat she was stopped by police dogs at the
airport for having
> > > 300 lbs of crack under her dress.
> > > <li>Yo momma so fat last time she went swimming she got
harpooned.
> > > <li>Yo momma so fat, when you was a baby and she bounced you on
her stomach -
> > > you high-fived Jesus...
> > > <li>Yo momma so fat, one day she was standing on the street
corner, and a cop
> > > came up to her and told her to break it up...
> > > <li>Yo momma so fat after sex she smokes a turkey!
> > > <li>Yo momma so fat she was born on the 4th, 5th and 6th of
March!
> > > <li>Yo momma so fat at the zoo, the elephants started throwing
her peanuts.
> > > <li>Yo momma so fat a picture of her would fall off the wall!
> > > <li>Yo momma so fat if she got her shoes shined, she'd have to
take his word
> > > for it!
> > > <li>Yo momma so fat if she wears fishnet stockings, they'd
better be 50 pound
> > > test!
> > > <li>Yo momma so fat if she weighed five more pounds, she could
get group
> > > insurance!
> > > <li>Yo momma so fat she shows up on radar.
> > > <li>Yo momma so fat she uses a mattress as a maxi-pad
> > > <li>Yo momma so fat she uses a pillow case as a sock.
> > > <li>Yo momma so fat she gets clothes in three sizes: extra
large, jumbo, and
> > > oh-my-god-it's-coming-towards-us!
> > > <li>Yo momma so fat she lives in two time zones: supper time and
dinner time.
> > > <li>Yo momma so fat when you put her in a jacuzzi she makes her
own gravy!
> > > <li>Yo momma so fat her tits are in two different time zones.
> > > <li>Yo momma so fat when she brings down the house she takes New
York with her
> > > <li>Yo momma so fat when she wears red, all the kids scream "Hey
KOOLAID!"
> > > <li>Yo momma so fat that when she cuts herself, she bleeds
cottage cheese.
> > > <li>Yo momma so fat she thinks a balanced meal is a ham in each
hand
> > > <li>Yo momma so fat when she puts her foot down she clears
rainforests
**********************************************************************
********
> > > <li>Yo momma so stupid it takes her 2 hours to watch 60 minutes
> > > <li>Yo momma so stupid when she saw the NC-17 (under 17 not
admitted) sign,
> > > she went home and got 16 friends
> > > <li>Yo momma so stupid when your dad said it was chilly outside,
she ran
> > > outside with a spoon
> > > <li>Yo momma so stupid she told everyone that she was
"illegitiment" because
> > > she couldn't read
> > > <li>Yo momma so stupid that she puts lipstick on her head just
to make-up her
> > > mind
> > > <li>Yo momma so stupid you have to dig for her IQ!
> > > <li>Yo momma so stupid she got locked in a grocery store and
starved!
> > > <li>Yo momma so stupid that she tried to put M&M's in
alphabetical order!
> > > <li>Yo momma so stupid she tripped over a cordless phone!
> > > <li>Yo momma so stupid she sold her car for gasoline money!
> > > <li>Yo momma so stupid she bought a solar-powered flashlight!
> > > <li>Yo momma so stupid she took a cup to see Juice.
> > > <li>Yo momma so stupid she asked you "What is the number for
911"
> > > <li>Yo momma so stupid she took a ruler to bed to see how long
she slept.
> > > <li>Yo momma so stupid when she read on her job application to
not write below
> > > the dotted line she put "O.K."
> > > <li>Yo momma so stupid she got stabbed in a shoot out.
> > > <li>Yo momma so stupid she stole free bread.
> > > <li>Yo momma so stupid she took a spoon to the superbowl.
> > > <li>Yo momma so stupid she called Dan Quayle for a spell check.
> > > <li>Yo momma so stupid she stepped on a crack and broke her own
back.
> > > <li>Yo momma so stupid she makes Beavis and Butt-Head look like
Nobel Prize
> > > winners.
> > > <li>Yo momma so stupid she thought she needed a token to get on
Soul Train.
> > > <li>Yo momma so stupid when asked on an application, "Sex?", she
marked, "M, F
> > > and sometimes Wednesday too."
> > > <li>Yo momma so stupid she took the Pepsi challenge and chose
JIF.
> > > <li>Yo momma so stupid when you stand next to her you hear the
ocean!
> > > <li>Yo momma so stupid she thinks Fleetwood Mac is a new
hamburger at
> > > McDonalds!
> > > <li>Yo momma so stupid she sits on the TV, and watches the
couch!
> > > <li>Yo momma so stupid that she thought Boyz II Men was a day
care center.
> > > <li>Yo momma so stupid when she went to take the 44 bus, she
took the 22 twice
> > > instead.
> > > <li>Yo momma so stupid she jumped out the window and went up.
> > > <li>Yo momma so stupid she thought a quarterback was an income
tax refund.
> > > <li>Yo momma so stupid she took a umbrella to see Purple Rain.
> > > <li>Yo momma so stupid that under "Education" on her job
application, she put
> > > "Hooked on Phonics."
> > > <li>Yo momma so stupid she put out the cigarette butt that was
heating your
> > > house.
> > > <li>Yo momma so stupid she watches "The Three Stooges" and takes
notes.
> > > <li>Yo momma so stupid she was born on Independence Day and
can't remember her
> > > birthday.
> > > <li>Yo momma so stupid she thought gangrene was another golf
course
> > > <li>Yo momma so stupid she couldn't read an audio book
> > > <li>Yo momma so stupid it takes her a month to get rid of the 7
day itch.
> > > <li>Yo momma so stupid she thought the Nazis were saying "Hi!
Hitler"
> > > <li>Yo momma so stupid it takes her a week to get rid of a 24hr
virus
> > > <li>Yo momma so stupid it takes her a day to cook a 3 minute egg
> > > <li>Yo momma so stupid She has to ask for help to use Hamburger
Helper
> > > <li>Yo momma so stupid She went to disneyworld and saw a sign
that said
> > > "Disneyworld Left" so she went home.
> > > <li>Yo momma so stupid she asked me what kind of jeans I had on
and I said
> > > "Guess" so she said Levi's
> > > <li>Yo momma so stupid she went to Alpha Beta and asked to buy a
vowel.
> > > <li>Yo momma so stupid she gave your uncle a blowjob cause he
said it would
> > > help with his unemployment........
> > > <li>Yo momma so stupid she called the cocaine hotline to order
some.
> > > <li>Yo momma so stupid she tried to commit suicide and jumped
off the curb.
> > > <li>Yo momma so stupid she saw a "wet floor" sign and peed on
the floor
> > > <li>Yo momma so stupid she thought Taco Bell was a Mexican phone
company.
> > > <li>Yo momma so stupid it takes her an hour to cook minute rice.
> > > <li>Yo momma so stupid she cooked her own complimentary
breakfast.
> > > <li>Yo momma so stupid she got hit by a cup and told the police
that she got
> > > mugged.
> > > <li>Yo momma so stupid she thinks Johnny Cash is a pay toilet!
> > > <li>Yo momma so stupid she thinks socialism means partying!
> > > <li>Yo momma so stupid she thinks manual labor is a Mexican!
> > > <li>Yo momma so stupid she has blonde roots in her eyeballs.
> > > <li>Yo momma so stupid she went to a Clippers game to get a hair
cut.
> > > <li>Yo momma so stupid she went to a Whalers game to see Shamu.
> > > <li>Yo momma so stupid I saw her in the frozen food section w/a
fishing rod.
> > > <li>Yo momma so stupid she sat on a window ledge thinking she'd
get framed.
^ian^
My Momma always told me to respect other people's parents.
^ian^
Momma also told me, don't go around breaking young girls hearts..
waaahhoooo.
Corcovado
- ^ian^ wrote:
Momma also told me, don't go around breaking young girls hearts..
waaahhoooo.
Billie Jean is not my girl 8) 8) 8) i just luv it when u sing this song :lol: :lol: :lol:
KeithL
This thread reminds me of all the Fat people in the diet class of Little Britain :lol:
Alyapal
Lots of good stuff to make you laugh on here.
/
Enjoy (",)