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Actually, cheating and keeping other people on the side happens all over the world in every culture, not just in the West. Are we not dealing with the standard definition of marriage and common-law, meaning two people co-habitating and possessing official status of their commitment through documents like legal and religious marriage certificates or living together long enough to fall under legal frameworks (e.g. common-law)? As far as I know, having a mistress is not common-law because the man does not live with her every day and therefore would not legally fall under the framework for common-law.

While Islam allowed divorce, the Christian church was more resistant - precisely for the reason that they wanted to keep families together and have the couple work things out. They saw this as being in the best interest of society to avoid too many cases of single-parent families etc. It has turned out that many single-parent families exist today, but that is life. Women having access to good education and being allowed to participate in the workforce means that they can support themselves and any children they are left to raise alone. That is certainly a good thing. In polygamous relationships I find it hard to believe that a man can truly be there to support and raise so many children. He'd be spending so much time making enough money to financially support everyone. In essence, the women raising the children are pretty much doing it themselves anyway... sounds like single-parenting to me.

In cultures that accept women marrying more than one husband, the paternity of offspring shouldn't matter because there are likely laws e.g. about property ownership etc. that wouldn't rely on who the father is. Women are supposed to accept the other children from multiple wives and in some cultures they are raising the children together, the same should be expected from the men as well. In modern times genetic testing can be used to determine paternity, if it is deemed important.

In old times a shortage of men would have been a problem since men were the breadwinners, but nowadays women don't need to marry because they can work to support themselves, and they can find husbands elsewhere. Simply giving women more choices than marriage and producing children reduces the need for them to consider marriage with a man who already has some wives. I don't really see any other advantages to polygamy. One man and one woman balance out - too many men or too many women is not balanced and makes for lots of problems, in my opinion. Indeed, people who take on more than one husband or wife have guts!

It's good to hear your views kanelli.

Much food for thought.

Your last paragraph is one I would use for Islam allowing polygamy for the instances where it does make sense, rather than outlawing it completely. Islam doesn't say that we should all marry 4 wives (thank God! - but lays the strict guidelines down for a polygamous relationship.

In general, women are empowered in Islam compared - as we have discussed ad nauseum.

Similarly for Divorce, allowing divorce is not the same as advocating divorce or saying that monogamous, nuclear families aren't the ideal social unit. Islam puts a lot of emphasis on family - as you can see in the practice muslims around you. Islam allowed women to divorce their husbands - this was seen as an outrage.


Cheers,
Shafique

Yes, in fact, I would say that family is emphasised quite a bit amongst most devoutly religious people of every faith, and people who are spiritual if not necessarily "religious". The less spiritual people seem to be the ones that more easily lose sight of the importance of a healthy family life. If money or one's own personal satisfaction are put first then it can leave the family in a bit of a mess.

why never topic is one woman with many husbands?

MAC wrote:why never topic is one woman with many husbands?

Then start a thread about it.

it has already been discussed

Bleakus wrote:it has already been discussed

Really? Give us link dude.

lol a woman with so many husbands i dont think she would be a good wife i mean whose chores is she gonna do heheh

rudeboy wrote:lol a woman with so many husbands i dont think she would be a good wife i mean whose chores is she gonna do heheh

Same with man with lots of wives, whose chores he would help? It will confused him more.

y would a man wanna have so many wives. i mean one wife is ENOUGH for him. hearing her complain all da time. oh i dont want this oh i want that oh i want money oh i want that oh i want this UFFFFFf a man who marrys more then once is a bloody fool.

Really?! Or you're just trying to flatter asc? Aren't yah?

what happens if a man has more than one women who love him? what is he supposed to do?

love da one dat loves him da most

[quote="shafique"]Most western societies have multiple wives and husbands in practice these days.

Sorry, but I think that 'most' is a gross exaggeration. You are painting a very unfair and stereotypical picture of Western society.