Cheating...to Confess It Or Better To Keep It To Yourself?

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Aug 09, 2006
XRW-147 wrote:
FeiPo wrote:defferent between a lie and not to tell. everyone has a secret not to tell. I will look at it as a secret more than a lie. what would you do if your gf told you that she slept with someone??? <--- sad, angry, leave her or kick her out????


Concealing the truth still violates trust - foundation of any relationship. The initial feelings of being told your partner/lover has cheated on you is of course sadness and anger but some people can find comfort in knowing and manage to reconcile.

Personally, I haven't stayed with and never could stand to be with anyone who violates my trust. In my view if a person violates my trust its my right to know so and the person who keeps such 'secrets' from me is being nothing more than deceitful and selfish. One must be willing to bare the consequences of one's actions.


So, if she tells you you are going to break up with her, if she is not, when you found out you are going to break up with her..... so, why bother to tell you at the first place? might as well keep it secret.

FeiPo
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Aug 09, 2006
FeiPo wrote:So, if she tells you you are going to break up with her, if she is not, when you found out you are going to break up with her..... so, why bother to tell you at the first place? might as well keep it secret.


Wonderful thing being human. If you can't tell someone about it, there's no point doing it. There's no such thing as a secret.
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Aug 09, 2006
^ian^ wrote:
FeiPo wrote:So, if she tells you you are going to break up with her, if she is not, when you found out you are going to break up with her..... so, why bother to tell you at the first place? might as well keep it secret.


Wonderful thing being human. If you can't tell someone about it, there's no point doing it. There's no such thing as a secret.


sometime sh*t happened!! that means no one want it to happen. Beside, human being make mistake. Not all mistakes are acceptable, but what to do when you have made a mistake already??? 2 anwsers <--- confess or no to confess. I chose not to confess on this subject.
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Aug 10, 2006
FeiPo wrote:So, if she tells you you are going to break up with her, if she is not, when you found out you are going to break up with her..... so, why bother to tell you at the first place? might as well keep it secret.


I mentioned that personally I would not tolerate it - some suckers out there do....

Why bother? Ever heard of decency? You are in control on your own life and just because you have decided to make a mistake doesn't mean you have to let someone else live their life with one.
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Aug 10, 2006
XRW-147 wrote:
FeiPo wrote:So, if she tells you you are going to break up with her, if she is not, when you found out you are going to break up with her..... so, why bother to tell you at the first place? might as well keep it secret.


I mentioned that personally I would not tolerate it - some suckers out there do....

Why bother? Ever heard of decency? You are in control on your own life and just because you have decided to make a mistake doesn't mean you have to let someone else live their life with one.


thats a bit extreme dont u think? People sin and sometimes do crazy things but if they were Sincere enough to admit it and ask for forgivness i think one should...To Sin Is Human To Forgive Is Divine ...i think u should have more tolerance
Corcovado
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Aug 10, 2006
I could never keep it a secret - it would eat away at my conscience. Knowing me, I'd tell if I ever cheated. However, also knowing me - I would never cheat in the first place. :)
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Aug 10, 2006
To Sin Is Human, completely agree with Corcovado.
After all, what is sin and what do you mean by cheating?
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Aug 11, 2006
Corcovado wrote:...To Sin Is Human To Forgive Is Divine ...i think u should have more tolerance


We are never closer to God's grace than when we admit our sins and cry out for pardon...


For one to forgive one must first hear the cries for pardon.
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Aug 11, 2006
XRW-147 wrote:
Corcovado wrote:...To Sin Is Human To Forgive Is Divine ...i think u should have more tolerance


We are never closer to God's grace than when we admit our sins and cry out for pardon...


For one to forgive one must first hear the cries for pardon.

ur not easy to please or forgive r u?
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Aug 11, 2006
Corcovado wrote:ur not easy to please or forgive r u?


You don't get what it means? - You can't forgive what you do not know.
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Aug 26, 2006
the most important thing in love is to be faithfull...if your BF/GF is unfaithfull he/she doesn't deserve your love, if you are attract by someone else that means there is a real problem you should tell the truth
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Aug 27, 2006
shanya wrote:the most important thing in love is to be faithfull...if your BF/GF is unfaithfull he/she doesn't deserve your love, if you are attract by someone else that means there is a real problem you should tell the truth


I second that! 8)
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Aug 27, 2006
even with cries of pardon I won't forgive...[/quote]
shanya
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Aug 27, 2006
XRW-147 wrote:
Corcovado wrote:ur not easy to please or forgive r u?


You don't get what it means? - You can't forgive what you do not know.



OK XRW, if you cheat you tell ?
shanya
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Aug 27, 2006
shanya wrote:
XRW-147 wrote:
Corcovado wrote:ur not easy to please or forgive r u?


You don't get what it means? - You can't forgive what you do not know.



OK XRW, if you cheat you tell ?

hmmmm
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Aug 27, 2006
Corcovado wrote:
shanya wrote:
XRW-147 wrote:
Corcovado wrote:ur not easy to please or forgive r u?


You don't get what it means? - You can't forgive what you do not know.



OK XRW, if you cheat you tell ?

hmmmm


What do you think Corco? :wink:
shanya
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Aug 27, 2006
:!:
Corcovado
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Aug 27, 2006
if your BF cheat and tell you the truth you forgive or you break ?
shanya
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Aug 27, 2006
shanya wrote:if your BF cheat and tell you the truth you forgive or you break ?


i dont know really .cos non of my exs ever cheated on me ... and i dont think i will forgive ,i will set him free and find myself a better man ....cos i cant stand lies :x
Corcovado
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Aug 27, 2006
humm
shanya
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Aug 27, 2006
Before breaking up with him, ask yourself why he cheated on you:
If he is a s@x drivin guy dump his sorry a#@

But if he is an ok guy and cheated on you ask why...
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Re: cheating...to confess it or better to keep it to yoursel Aug 27, 2006
alexandra wrote:if u will be unfaithfull in a realtionship what would be the reasons, and will u confess it or not???


Whats the meaning of a relationship if there is unfaithfulness on anyone's part?

Faith is what brings about a relationship and holds it strong and if thats not what you can give to a relationship ... might as well not have one.

So if you cant be faithful - might as well opt out of the relationship.
Dream Catcher
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Aug 28, 2006
You may cheat for revenge, you may cheat because you have the opportunity, you may cheat because you can't control your lust.
What i believe it's an option you may take it or not, in everything we do we always have an alternative, we choose not the others.

The other thing is when someone cheats in an affair then most probably the other part has something to do with it, nobody cheats on thin air.
But you have to face your man/woman right in the eyes and take the responsibility of your actions.

For me, if i feel that something's wrong in my relationship i find a polite excuse and i brake up with my GF, there's no need to feel guilty or to hurt someone's feelings.
This is something that differenciates the true man from the boy we all have inside. This is my way and i follow it wether is right or wrong....
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Aug 28, 2006
i will never forgive cheating and i do not think anyone should. if you are not happy in relationship then walk away and do what you like. why hurt someone?? it is very painfull to be cheated on
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Aug 28, 2006
sara_uk wrote:i will never forgive cheating and i do not think anyone should. if you are not happy in relationship then walk away and do what you like. why hurt someone?? it is very painfull to be cheated on


you can't really generalize like that, i am not saying you should condone cheating but you will never know how you react till you are in the situation itself and can assess all the different factors that went to it. So i dont think anyone should put an absolute answer to this question.
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Aug 28, 2006
MaaaD wrote:
sara_uk wrote:i will never forgive cheating and i do not think anyone should. if you are not happy in relationship then walk away and do what you like. why hurt someone?? it is very painfull to be cheated on


you can't really generalize like that, i am not saying you should condone cheating but you will never know how you react till you are in the situation itself and can assess all the different factors that went to it. So i dont think anyone should put an absolute answer to this question.


it is absolute for me, cheating is not worth forgiven for as i said if someone want to cheat they can walk away first. i think the thought of living with a cheater will kill me. i know myself and i know i can not forgive cheating.
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Aug 28, 2006
IF YOU CHEAT GO OUT !! no matter the reason ...if your BF cheats he does it because he is a looser and an a**h*** that's it ! he is not enough courageous to act like a man and face the truth! OUT OUT OUT
shanya
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Aug 28, 2006
shanya wrote:IF YOU CHEAT GO OUT !! no matter the reason ...if your BF cheats he does it because he is a looser and an a**h*** that's it ! he is not enough courageous to act like a man and face the truth! OUT OUT OUT


someone is upset :shock: :shock: :shock: easy now
Corcovado
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Aug 28, 2006
shanya wrote:IF YOU CHEAT GO OUT !! no matter the reason ...if your BF cheats he does it because he is a looser and an a**h*** that's it ! he is not enough courageous to act like a man and face the truth! OUT OUT OUT


easy girl eaaaaaaaaaaasy what did I say? bury the topic and turn the page and start a new life......no use to depress urself for somebody's mistake
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Aug 29, 2006
I was angry ... now I feeel pity for him.
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