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I think I had my most embarassing moment. I was feeling good, looking sharp, and then....I stumbled and dived on the dance floor. The floor was smooth and I slide a bit. In a slit second I thought to start break dancing (not that I ever did it) to save face, a split second later I dropped the idea, as it would most probably look me more bad. I left the place very embarassed. Not my finest hour. At least people had a laugh.

Whats your most embarassing moment?

Where do I start? The two that come to mind involve physical excercise. I used to be a member of our local 5* hotels gym and spa. I was in one of my 'let's get fit' modes and signed up for a spinning class. The first class wasn't too bad, there were quite a few people there so I didn't stand out. Although I had a very sore backside (from spinning) I decided to give it another go. This time there was only the class instructor, the gym manager (taking part) and me. We warmed up and moved it up a few gears. At this point I was breathing through my backside and the order came to stand up and peddle!
You know when people say their knees turned to jelly? Well mine did and they totally gave way. My feet were firmly strapped into the peddles and one of my legs came up round the back of my body and the other went in the opposite direction. I was unable to move. The instructor jumped off his bike and rushed over. I was still unable to move. He asked if he could lift me up. I looked him up and down, he must have been 8 stones wet through and unless he was superman he wasn't going to lift me anywhere anytime soon. I just asked him to undo my feet which he kindly did.
I made the excuse of just having recovered from the flu and made a sharp exit.
From now until this day I come out in a cold sweat if anyone mentions spinning classes.

The second incident wasn't really embarrasing but could have been so.

We went to the Maldives on holiday and on the first day I took a walk out into the sea. it was very shallow and suddenly it dropped away and became very deep. I'm not a bad swimmer, quite strong really so it didn't bother me at all and I swam for a while. I decided to make my way back to the beach and started swimming for shore. I swam and swam and it occured to me that I wasn't getting anywhere, in fact the current was carrying me further out. I swam a bit harder and started to panic a bit! What was I going to do? I would have to wave my hands and try to attract someone's attention They would have to send a boat out for me on my very first day. Oh no! the embarrasment of it all. I was just about to start shouting when I glanced to my right and a man walked past me. The current had carried me onto a shallow bit and my knees were just about scraping the sea bed when I was swimming. I saved myself from a very emarassing situation by standing up and walking to shore.

hmmm, well, i farted in an airplane once, and it was quite pungent actually , i was in first class too, so the suspicion was only 4 people, and my area was detected to be the source of the problem

LOL too many embarrassing moments to mention really. But one mortifying one was outside the Music Room, the pavement turns into sort of a ramp, I'm wearing my stack 5 inch heels am a few glasses of vino down and step from the pavement onto the slanted bit of road and literally just go rolling down the road - totally humiliating, but hey these things happen.

I always dread dressing room disasters and am always very very wary of trying on tops without a zip in them - being a little busty on top, some items just aren't made for boobs. One time I tried on this super top and it fitted perfectly in every way, I got it on, then had the struggling task of getting the thing off again. Being trussed up like a turkey with arms stuck and unable to pull the top over the ample chest is a tad of a nightmare! You start panicking, then of course you start to swell and it just gets worse and worse UNTIL I noticed the little zip in the side - DOH!

mmmm well I once destroyed a familys toilet system in the house by going for a number 2 ................

worst thing was it happened while I was there and they were in bed

Anyone beat that ?

paulcow4563 wrote:mmmm well I once destroyed a familys toilet system in the house by going for a number 2 ................

worst thing was it happened while I was there and they were in bed

Anyone beat that ?

Bloody hell that's impressive. What were you firing? An Exocet missile?

-- Mon Dec 05, 2011 9:14 pm --

shawagma wrote:hmmm, well, i farted in an airplane once, and it was quite pungent actually , i was in first class too, so the suspicion was only 4 people, and my area was detected to be the source of the problem

how common. Are you Indian?

paulcow4563 wrote:mmmm well I once destroyed a familys toilet system in the house by going for a number 2 ................

worst thing was it happened while I was there and they were in bed

Anyone beat that ?

Hahaha oh nooooooo! That's awful. A friend invited me over for my little pup to meet their dog and he decided to take a liquid, steaming dump on their carpet - ooops!

Chocoholic wrote:

paulcow4563 wrote:mmmm well I once destroyed a familys toilet system in the house by going for a number 2 ................

worst thing was it happened while I was there and they were in bed

Anyone beat that ?

Hahaha oh nooooooo! That's awful. A friend invited me over for my little pup to meet their dog and he decided to take a liquid, steaming dump on their carpet - ooops!

I was on a first date and I quite happily said yes when invited back it being a first date , I asked could I use the toilet and was directed to the a bathroom in the converted attic. It was one of those toilets that fills up and drains.

So I want and without being overly descriptive the procedure was a lengthy one once finished the usual cleaning of the areas were performed and then it became time to flush, so I did, and then I did erm and then I did so much so that I spent 15 minutes flushing due to the apparent lack of water pressure.

Once I could escape my tribulations in the bathroom I returned to the ground floor only to be greeted 5 minutes later by screaming coming from the Master Bedroom where the 3 inch pipe had exploded due to the plonker of a plumber putting in a 4 inch pipe from the converted bathroom causing a bit of a traffic jam

The girls father came down stairs looking slightly hysterical and not in the cleanest pyjamas to scream who used the f***g toilet I with much pity and compassion commenced to cry laughing when he said the pipe was in the airing cupboard and had rendered any items of clothing etc within redundant either due to Persil not being able to do the job or mental trauma at the thought of wearing them.


No need to mention there was no 2nd date lol

paulcow4563 wrote:

Chocoholic wrote:

paulcow4563 wrote:mmmm well I once destroyed a familys toilet system in the house by going for a number 2 ................

worst thing was it happened while I was there and they were in bed

Anyone beat that ?

Hahaha oh nooooooo! That's awful. A friend invited me over for my little pup to meet their dog and he decided to take a liquid, steaming dump on their carpet - ooops!

I was on a first date and I quite happily said yes when invited back it being a first date , I asked could I use the toilet and was directed to the a bathroom in the converted attic. It was one of those toilets that fills up and drains.

So I want and without being overly descriptive the procedure was a lengthy one once finished the usual cleaning of the areas were performed and then it became time to flush, so I did, and then I did erm and then I did so much so that I spent 15 minutes flushing due to the apparent lack of water pressure.

Once I could escape my tribulations in the bathroom I returned to the ground floor only to be greeted 5 minutes later by screaming coming from the Master Bedroom where the 3 inch pipe had exploded due to the plonker of a plumber putting in a 4 inch pipe from the converted bathroom causing a bit of a traffic jam

The girls father came down stairs looking slightly hysterical and not in the cleanest pyjamas to scream who used the f***g toilet I with much pity and compassion commenced to cry laughing when he said the pipe was in the airing cupboard and had rendered any items of clothing etc within redundant either due to Persil not being able to do the job or mental trauma at the thought of wearing them.


No need to mention there was no 2nd date lol

Hahaha....happened to me once where the entire drainage system got clonked and the neighborhood draining started to overflow...had to pay a hefty fine

shawagma wrote:hmmm, well, i farted in an airplane once, and it was quite pungent actually , i was in first class too, so the suspicion was only 4 people, and my area was detected to be the source of the problem

Hahahaha!

-- Tue Dec 06, 2011 10:27 am --

Is it true some cultures are ok with farting?

Only the Homosapien Ignoramus sub-culture and of course their offspring

What is the Homosapien Ignoramus sub-culutre?

Well for example, anyone who farts in an enclosed public space would qualify to be included within this particular category!

Yosef, did you know your name is a slang word in another language, describing this long silent very stinky fart kind?

In my language my name means "to double of good" or something like this. I dont know how to explain it properly in English, my first language is Arabic.

Yosef wrote:In my language my name means "to double of good" or something like this. I dont know how to explain it properly in English, my first language is Arabic.

In my language my name means 'gift from God'. I don't know what my Mother was thinking of.

All children are the gift of God to their parents.

Yosef wrote:All children are the gift of God to their parents.

Or a stupid mistake lol

Chocoholic wrote:

Yosef wrote:All children are the gift of God to their parents.

Or a stupid mistake lol

These days mistakes can be dealt with Chocs!

Unfortunately Yosef, it isn't always the case that children are the gift of God to their parents. There has been a case recently in the UK where the parents have been arrested, and released on bail, over the extremely serious injuries inflicted on their one month old son. Every rib was broken plus an arm and he had internal injuries from being raped. yes, raped. he was taken to hospital where he suffered a heart attack but is now showing signs of improvement. I don't know if the parents inflicted the injuries and I don't know why they were released on bail. That's English justice for you.

Oh thats some extreme case! I dont know how anyone could do that to a child!

Dillon wrote:Well for example, anyone who farts in an enclosed public space would qualify to be included within this particular category!

I find it quite ironic that you have such strong views about breaking wind when your icon is of a permanently stoned rabbit, some might say being stoned takes you back to that level anyway, albeit with an amazing craving for KFC

Breaking wind unfortunately is something we all have to contend with, some us dont admit to farting, we just smell funny when we cough

paulcow4563 wrote:

Dillon wrote:Well for example, anyone who farts in an enclosed public space would qualify to be included within this particular category!

I find it quite ironic that you have such strong views about breaking wind when your icon is of a permanently stoned rabbit, some might say being stoned takes you back to that level anyway, albeit with an amazing craving for KFC

Breaking wind unfortunately is something we all have to contend with, some us dont admit to farting, we just smell funny when we cough

What's with the KFC reference? I didn't get that one.
There is breaking wind and breaking wind in a confined space. It just isn't necessary and quite ing.

damn this thread is hilarious! XD

xero_ wrote:damn this thread is hilarious! XD

Share your most embarassing moment!